Words by Chelsea, 23 VIC
He slapped my arse
With a cardboard box
He thought it was a joke,
Of course.
Brown cardboard,
White skin,
My privilege didn’t stop him.
Laughing,
Walking across an invisible line
Time stood still.
‘Breathe’…
You’re fine.
For the shock of an action
Made in a place;
No vibration to leave my lips
Only the quiver
Of a gut feeling
White washed my entity.
Legs
Upright but quivering,
Eyes
Avoiding contact,
Head low;
All in front of his son
Who worked there also.
He didn’t share the usual reaction
But was embarrassed,
By his dads action.
He could see, in my eyes
How I felt at that moment in time.
This happened to me
As an employee
After the happening The realisation stings
I shoved it under a rug
With my other shameful things.
Only did I realise
What this actually was
After the Me Too movement
Did I see it for its cost.
It cost me confidence
It cost me pain
It cost me thinking
It was my fault
And I’m to blame.
It cost me trust
It caused me shame
It ate me whole
Until I cried again.
I release it in words
To claim, to own
What happened to me
So others know
They’re not so alone.
Illustration by Aileen, You can find more of her work on Instagram @aileenetc